I am going to make a confession today.  Some of you will immediately relate to it.  Some of you will try to pretend like it's never happened to you (and you're lying).  Others will laugh hysterically because you'll recall that one time when you did it and how you got busted and how mortifying it was. A few of you will claim this conversation is "TMI."  But it's biology.  And, as the old adage, suggests . . . IT HAPPENS!  And it happened to me in Mexico.  And, lo and behold, I later learned there's a possible remedy.

So, here's the excerpt from the Facebook account I shared with my friends.  This is what happened . . .

Our final full day at the pool started off with HORRID gas. Yes, you read that correctly. However, quick clarification! The gastrointestinal distress was not nearly as bad as two years ago at the Hideaway at Royalton when I actually crapped myself as I slept. No, today's bout wasn't quite as traumatic for me, Kevin and the housekeeping staff. Today's incident was MUCH more manageable. But, a quick pop quiz for you! What happens when you eat lunch on Thursday and there are onions in it? What then happens when you have dinner Thursday night and your appetizer is laced with pickled red onions and your entree also has red onions in it? Then, you reach over to Kevin's plate and lift from it a giant, sauteed green onion? Answer- you wake up on Friday thinking that if you fart you are going to blow a hole in the middle of Cancun's hotel zone. Around 11am, right after my morning run, I thought I was going to spontaneously combust. I'm serious. Now I know what that nuclear reactor in Japan felt like when it started leaking radiation after the tsunami a couple of years ago. And I was sitting in my cabana . . . game planning . . . trying to plan the perfect time to let 'er rip. There were a lot of people passing by and I just ordered lunch . . . so I was trying to be discreet, yet energy efficient. Finally, I had my chance! With my freshly delivered B.L.T. on one side of the cabana, I rolled over to the other side and released the proverbial kraken. And, as soon as I did, I heard this voice say "That sandwich looks really good. Where did you order that?" SERIOUSLY?? Where did SHE come from?"

Yes!  I was totally busted!  By this random woman who seemingly appeared from thin air.  Except, at that time, the air wasn't thin at all.  It was ripe and thick and unfortunate.  LOL!  Okay, so maybe this is TMI.

However, I share this story with you to let you know that help has arrived!  My friend Pattie Martin told me about this product called Subtle Butt Disposable Gas Neutralizers.  Here's how they work!

Subtle Butt Disposable Gas Neutralizers are available online at Walmart.com.  They retail for just $12.95.  And, for clarification, YES!  They are only available via the internet.  Just ask Sydney the Intern.  We sent her to Walmart today and made her ask for them.  It was HILARIOUS!!!