First of all, don't judge me.  Yes, I have that much butter and margarine in my refrigerator. My arteries have about three more weeks to function properly.

Secondly, don't judge me for this. You know that fun social media trend?  The one in which you fill in the blanks to this. I was _____ years old when I learned _____.

Well, I was exactly 50-years-and-2-months-old when I learned that butter has an expiration date. Seriously!  I don't know why that never occurred to me, but I legitimately had no idea that butter will expire until yesterday morning when I was slicing off a pad to melt in the bottom of my omelette pan.

And now, knowing that there's an expiration date on butter and I wasn't aware of that for over half a century, I feel like the village idiot of Land O Lakes. I feel as if I got dressed up for Easter and somebody tied my Blue Bonnet too tightly around my head.

And here's the kicker. I learned this fun fact completely by accident.

Here's what I noticed and how.

Chad Benefield
Chad Benefield
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See there???!!!!  May 5th, 2022!!  An expiration date and a freaking time stamp to go along with it.

Okay, full admission.  This story gets even sadder.  I probably wouldn't have noticed the expiration date had it not been printed next to the corner of the block of butter that hit the floor when I dropped it.  And can we get a timeout for the fact that it looks like I bought factory-dented and damaged butter?  LOL!

But in my defense, I realized, after surveying all the other butter in my fridge, that it's no wonder I never noticed the expiration dates.

I mentioned Blue Bonnet earlier. Look at this sorcery!

Chad Benefield
Chad Benefield
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Gurl, I'm like two years away from cataracts.  How am I supposed to see that fine print over in the corner of the lid?

And I mentioned Land O Lakes too.  Look at this crap!  Do you see an expiration date here?  Huh?  Do you?

Chad Benefield
Chad Benefield
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No, you don't.  You know why?  Because it's on the freaking bottom of the tub where no one ever looks!  Did the 1700+ Farmers strong ever stop to consider we're not proctologists and don't make a habit of looking up the ass of our tubs of butter.

Chad Benefield
Chad Benefield
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Well, now that I know butter has an expiration date, I had to look online to see how long it's good past that date.  I went right to a trusted source- EatByDate.com.

According to the experts on the site:

Butter lasts for about 6-9 months in the refrigerator and if there is a "best by" date stamped on the package then it will last for at least a month beyond that date, that is if it has been stored properly.

Well, ain't that some Country Crock?!!  But it's certainly good to know.  I am just horribly embarrassed that it only took me fifty years to find it out.

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