SURPRISE, SURPRISE: Shopper Finds Python on Indiana Walmart Shelf
Great Value, Equate, Mainstays, Parent's Choice, Better Homes and Gardens... I could go on and on. You recognize it, right? It's a list of just a few of Walmart's familiar brands.
I don't see anything on that list or on the list of the REST of the retail giant's brands that says anything about SNAKES. I mean, Walmart DOES have pet care products, but I doubt they apply to reptiles. But I don't own one, so I wouldn't know. Just guessing.
ELF ON A SHELF EXCEPT IT'S A SNAKE
But what if you're shopping, just cruising right along, doing your thing at Walmart and you reach for something you wish to purchase and there, next to the paper towels and plastic flatware you find a PYTHON. (I have no idea if the snake was discovered in "picnic supplies"; that was just creative license for this otherwise true and uncomfortable story you are reading.)
I hate snakes. I just do. I come by it honestly. My parents were both terrified of them, as well. And I can tell you I'm not sure I'd handle happening upon a constricting serpent while shopping very well at all. Even if it's a small one like this guy, whose name is Wolverine. (I'm glad he doesn't use the OTHER Wolverine's manicurist.)
MEET WOLVERINE THE PYTHON
WHO WANTS TO OWN A YOUNG PYTHON?
I have to tell you, when the City of Bloomington Animal Care and Control said that Wolverine was "a bit stressed and slightly spicy," a chill ran down my spine. And I'm nowhere NEAR Bloomington. Yes, I hate them.
Also, I've been IN that Walmart, but all I got was windshield washer fluid. There were no snakes.
But apparently, this little dude will be well taken care of and, in fact, Bloomington is looking for someone who will take Wolverine into their home. They're directing interested parties toward the Animal Care and Control page on the city's website.
Enjoy your next trip to Walmart; it's a jungle out there.